Notice the Glimmers
What does writing feel like to you? When I’m walking through the world, sometimes I am struck by words that scream to be written. Yes, “struck” is the right term. They are loud, sudden, unrelenting, and rile up my emotions unless I put them on paper. Sometimes life gets busy and I can’t make time to write. These words are still churning up my insides, perhaps for a week straight, until I pick up the pen. One of my little luxuries I buy myself every so often is a very fancy, handmade journal, and new set of stylish pens. It’s worth it because I’m the kind of person who fills every page. My journals and notebooks are an extension of me and contain thoughts unfiltered by society. Dangerous and important stuff. (I deem them dangerous and important to me, not to the world. It feels dangerous to have the rawest form of myself in ink, yet its importance is that my truest self has a outlet. Aren’t we all a little afraid someone will see past the mask and hate what’s there?)
From time to time, I get to write words that will be read by others. These are the times I must edit my dangerous and important words. Writing for me feels like letting my dangerous thoughts out to play. There they are, behind glass walls, contained within the structure I’m writing for, yet clear for all to read. My short film, The Piece, mashes together chunks of my real music school memories, with bits of how those memories made me feel. Together they form a new reality; my personal truth of how I saw the world at that time. The fact that the film has been so well received, somewhat feels like people accept that peek behind my mask.
This June, I’m ecstatic to announce, I’m writing as a new member of the sketch troupe Sponsored By! I wrote sketch comedy in high school and college, but stopped when I knew comedy wasn’t my ultimate path and exploratory time was over. Which it isn’t really. I stopped because this society told me past a certain age, you can’t do things for fun. So starting junior year of college, I just began telling people comedy wasn’t my thing. Meanwhile, I kept going to every show I had time and money for. It’s my favorite thing to do at night in New York. And if you’re reading this, there’s a high chance you’re in my outer circle of “funny friends” and I’ve been to your show.
I love the rules of comedy. I love how deeply smart a comedian must be to make people laugh about the world. It’s takes rhythm, observation, performance, guts, and work. The last show I went to, I told one of these outer circle funny friends how I used to write comedy, but now I prefer to be everyone’s guaranteed ticket sale. He replied with an invite to write for the show next time. I assumed it was just him being polite. However the next day there was a google form in my inbox asking when I’m available. Then I was at a pitch meeting. Then I remembered just how non-stop-giggly-happy writing with others makes me feel. There’s only so long you can walk circles around a swimming pool before someone pushes you in.
New Bedford film festival
Getting to go home to celebrate film and local artists with my family and friends is probably pretty close to a perfect day. The inaugural year of the New Bedford Film Festival had screenings and events throughout the cobblestone streets of downtown. Growing up in Westport, this neighboring city was always the place I was told to avoid. People said it was dangerous (my word of the day, isn’t it?) and all that’s left worth seeing is the Whaling Museum. However, every year since my last days in high school, there’s another restaurant someone is murmuring has the best clam chowder. Art exhibits are drawing bigger audiences. Now thanks to a group of New England talent who believe in the merit of our work, there’s a film festival bringing us all together.
Throughout the days of the festival, I got to speak with representatives from Women In Film, producers on new web series, masterful cinematographers, and actors who’ve spent years on Broadway and beyond. Since most people at the VIP events were originally from the south coast, networking wasn’t as intimidating as it usually is. People were excited and eager to meet the other New Englander’s who’ve come home to celebrate our corner of the world.
A highlight for me was watching my family fill half the screening room just to watch my 8 minute short. For many of them, it was their first film festival! If youre not accustomed to festivals, the genres and pacing of indie films can be surprising. Filmmakers without the pressure of a hundred executives in some ivory tower, tend to write from the heart. This lack of pressure, and lack of finances, creates unique work. Joyfully, they let themselves relax into the fun of never knowing what’s next.
Though The Piece’s festival run isn’t over, I’ve now got this glowing sense that I’ve changed my life in a beautiful way. My expectations for this short were to have fun on set with my favorite film people, get some great footage for our reels, and screen at one fest. Six film festivals and countless networking events later, my name is out in the world as a budding filmmaker. The title feels like trying on a new dress that stunningly fits like a glove. Surprised and joyful, you walk out of the shop dreaming of all the places you’ll go in your new lovely garmet. I didn’t expect to adorn the title of director so thoroughly, but now I am eager to show everyone what I can do.