Moonshot
This past year I quietly released another EP entitled “Aimless”. I did so without too much of a ruckus because this collection of songs felt like something I just needed to get off my chest more than music I’d run through the whole dog and pony show. If my incredible 6 monthly listeners is any indication, I was also on a break from music. A big break. I was writing, but everything else didn’t feel right. Maybe making a film about the pressure of being a perfect musician gives you some clue as to why…ANYWAY, my favorite track on The Aimless EP is “SF”. The first time I visited San Francisco in 2021, I sampled the sound of the wave organ, a bunch of pipes half-submerged in the ocean far out on a pier. These samples became the pads of that track, infusing it with the essence of a city that gave me freedom from quarantine and heartbreak. Though I didn’t know it yet, at that time I was developing depression and anxiety. (which through therapy, friends, and new life experiences I’m happy to say I’m no longer in that cycle) For the one week I was in San Francisco however, it was as if all the bad things didn’t matter. I was with my friends, adventuring, and remembering that there is so much to see in life. I pushed pause on the pain.
In one week I’ll be visiting San Francisco again and I’m so excited to discover what it brings me this time. If the most I do is stare at sunsets, hug some redwoods, and drink coffee with friends, I will be a very happy traveler.
I recently joined a women in film networking group called Moonshot Initiative. In the month of December, I was on a mission to expand my circles. A big part of that is just showing up to things and hoping it works out. I am lucky to know many skilled filmmakers, but most of them are in New England where we shot THE PIECE. Despite working and taking classes in the city for two years now, I still feel like I haven’t found my creative tribe here. So early in December, I put on an outfit that made me feel confident and walked into this Moonshot gala-event-thing. Immediately, one of the circles of talking women broke open for me. They asked about my story and my goals. We laughed about how lost we all constantly feel. We followed each other on instagram, and then actually stayed in touch!
I don’t know what will come of those relationships in the future, but I do know that if you’re honest about feeling a little lost and wanting so badly to write and create with others, someone else is gonna want the same thing. People are often afraid of looking lonely so they put on a mask of total independence. Maybe it comes from school, where eating lunch by yourself was the epitome of otherness. I keep finding however, that if you’re the one to say “hello” first, there’s usually a rush of relief and gratitude that you opened a conversation. My hope for you in 2024 is that you keep reaching out.